Tag Archives: slinky

When I Go Shopping: Audrey’s Spring Predictions

11 Apr

My lovely friend, the multitalented Audrey Hotchkiss, has shared her style predictions for spring so that you may obey her unquestioningly when you go shopping. It started in Google chat:

Audrey:

I think when I go shopping, I need a lot of nice, shiny shirts.

slinky

is the name of the game this spring

you can quote me on that

Here are some more tips:
  • Tunic-length lightweight sweaters and little capri-lengths leggings
  • Dresses with pockets: they are functional AND flirty and a great way to get a promotion when you’re bending over to pick up a piece of paper in front of your boss.
  • Scandinavian knits are the coolest thing since we remembered that there were a bunch of people living up there. Thank you, Sigur Ros’ last album for that tidbit.
  • As far as footwear goes: ladies – you are in luck, puddle jumpers for EVERYONE and LL Bean has this new cool thing that goes inside them to keep your feet from smelling like dead peoples’ toenails.
  • garter stitch is hot, purl is not
  • Ladies of Portland, ME will not be caught dead making a “bad decision” at a house party in any underwear other than the ones Diane from Ferdinand makes with her own blood, sweat and tears.
She also has ideas for accessories:
You will be seeing a lot of rocks from Maine beaches, probably bottle caps too. I am my own billboard. As for scarves – I think the chic ‘I accept everyone, especially the cultures my government is oppressing’ middle-eastern scarf is OUT. Sure, it looks awesome and I didn’t get to join that fad, but I’ve had enough. The new cool scarf is…well, it looks like this:

this is the cool scarf now

I panicked. I just googled ‘gorgeous scarf’ and that’s what I got, but I’m comfortable with it.

I think I might try to do more of these predictions if any of my other friends are interested. It’ll be fun! As Audrey said, “I like saying what’s cool and what isn’t. It makes me feel powerful.”

Kate the millionaire and Audrey the Riveter on Halloween