Halloween #1: when will we lead a normal life?

In the shower Friday morning, I decided to be an alien for work. Every year, I get so excited about Halloween. I love candy, crunchy leaves, and cheesy horror movies, but most of all, I love costumes. Every year, I come up with about 17 ideas about what I’m going to be. Every year, I change my mind at the last minute.

It wasn’t hard to find alien-appropriate attire in my room full of clothes. The hardest part was deciding between a kelly green lurex minidress or my suction-cup shirt. I figured I should be a modest alien at work, so I went with three layers of ripped tights in blue, green, and yellow for a scaly effect, a knee-length gold skirt from Find, and my suction-cup shirt. I’ve actually gotten a surprising amount of non-costume wear out of that shirt, which I got for $15 a decade ago when I worked at Filene’s Basement. It’s a nice black t-shirt with six suction cups (each of which are embossed with the words “KISS THE FUTURE!”) on the front and a detachable long right sleeve.

the suction cup shirt, not Halloween, 2009. photo stolen from Bryan Bruchman.

I wore rhinestone earrings that are so large that they have a post for the earlobe and a clip at the top, and fan out like little branches. I painted my face with a mixture of white foundation and shimmery purple and green eyeshadow, then added a shit ton of turquoise and green eyeshadow. I pinned a disposable camera flash to a sequined headband, slipped on some sensible shoes, and headed to work.

Nobody else was wearing a costume. Okay, sure, there was one lady with a pretty sweet sparkly witch hat, but I knew that thing would be crammed into her locker by lunchtime. This is not the first time this has happened to me.

Halloween at work, 2004

one other girl was wearing cat ears

All day long, despite my shimmering green face, people asked me if I was a flapper.

I mean, I know the headband is a classic Halloween-flapper thing, but come on! Green face! Suction cup shirt!

After work, I went to Ferdinand to visit Diane.

Diane

 

“Don’t you wish people dressed like this all the time?” she asked. I do! I totally do! Diane is the best.

Later that night, I greeted my boyfriend’s mother, Kristy, at our front door in my alien costume, then wiped off my makeup in the kitchen so we could go to dinner. We went to see Mike’s new band, Sunset Hearts, and his less new band, Huak, at Slainte. Kristy and I danced up front. It was a pretty great start to the Halloweekend.

adventures with Audrey

Audrey wrote another hilarious post about our continuing photography misadventures. You should totally read it.

Fortunately, despite all the photoshoot craziness, I have managed to update my Etsy store, so you should totally look at that, too.

Now with more goofy pictures of me!

Sena’s Outfit

My friend Sena was wearing an adorable outfit, so I tried to take her picture as she danced around her apartment.

She put on some boots and a sweet feathered hat.

I love how she’s dressed for cold weather, but looks like a lady, not a marshmallow. It’s hard to see her scarf in the pictures, but it’s got thin blue stripes and it’s the softest thing in the world. She got it for four bucks at Material Objects! I was jealous so I bought an orange one (mine was more expensive because I didn’t score a used one).

UPDATE: Derek took this picture of me dancing in my orange scarf.

You can see one of Sena’s lanky black cats lurking in the background. Eeeek!

prostitute laundry

Last week, I was mistaken for a prostitute. I will now use this as an excuse to post what I was wearing.

skirt

I got this awesome Gertrude Knickerbocker skirt at Picnic! I have actually wanted a skirt made from this fabric for a wicked long time, so I was totally psyched to find this skirt:

• in my size!
• long enough to wear to work!
• with pockets!

Yaaaayyyy!

You can find some more cool Gertrude Knickerbocker stuff, great dirt cheap vintage, and records on Congress Street above Strange Maine (which I also recommend) at Moody Lords (where I bought a crop top because Audrey told me to)!

Purse Wall!

My friend Kate has a purse wall. It looks wicked cool and it’s a good way to store purses. I took some lousy cell phone pictures. Enjoy!

Kate works at one of my favorite local clothing stores, Club 21. When I was fifteen, I totally bought the world’s tiniest miniskirt from the five dollar bin, but she probably didn’t work there then. Anyway, I really liked her purse wall, so here you go.

soooo cuuuute

Picnic!

Tomorrow, I’ll be  selling all kinds of awesome stuff with the amazing Audrey Hotchkiss! If you live around here, you should totally come visit our booth and buy tons of jewelry, clothing, and photography.

I’ve been pretty busy getting ready for this, plus I wrote a review of a Lifetime movie for my friend Rusty’s blog (watching trash TV is essential to my jewelry-making process). Next week, I should have a post about the gorgeous (and possibly HAUNTED) dresses Greg and Sam pulled out of their attic for me!

the Enduring Awesomeness of a Crappy Mall T-Shirt

that Gulf station has delicious samosas

This is my boyfriend, Mike, in the Calvin Klein parody t-shirt that he probably got at the Bangor Mall in 1997, when Seinfeld was nearing its end and Calvin Klein logos were proudly displayed across the chests of status-conscious high schoolers. Witty and topical then, this t-shirt has now outlasted the garments it parodied: recently I saw a man across the street wearing a CK logo tee, and immediately thought, “hey, that guy’s wearing Mike’s Cosmo Kramer shirt.”

Cosmo Kramer

Once ubiquitously emblazoned on perfume bottles, sweatshirts, and tees, the CK logo is no longer the suburban rich kid badge of honor it was when I was a teenager, but it is still familiar and iconic to anyone who shopped for clothing in the 1990s. Seinfeld is a beloved show, and Michael Richards still shows up sometimes in episodes of Curb Your Enthusiasm (not to mention the insane racism he started spouting at a comedy club a few years back). Still, this shirt has a strange charisma that is more than the sum of its parts. I have not known Mike to wear it without getting several compliments from strangers. Maybe its lasting power has something to do with the way that even though it is parodying a status symbol of sorts, it doesn’t aim to make a statement about those who choose to wear designer logos. Also, as Mike pointed out, Kramer is rarely called “Cosmo” on the show, and he isn’t the lead actor, which maybe makes the joke just weird and silly enough to not get stale after over a decade.

this shirt is also great

Last night, as we walked home after First Friday, we passed a lady with great hair who looked effortlessly cool as she sat smoking on the steps of her apartment building. We were a few feet past her when she called after us,  “You know,  Michael Richards is in town.”

Good Things

I have been complaining way too much. My busted foot and my financial situation are making me a huge bummer. This needs to stop! Here are some good things:

I found a purse I don’t hate:

it's usually less squashed

It can fit all the stuff I need, including a hardcover book!

Boot.

I went to the doctor yesterday, and he pulled on my toe and told me my foot was still broken. I have to wear my Aircast for three more weeks. Gross. It’s super hot and I want to wear sandals. I don’t own any sandals, but if I didn’t have medical bills and a busted foot, I could probably go buy some sandals and wear BOTH OF THEM AT THE SAME TIME! I miss wearing matching shoes, although it was pretty great when one of my customers didn’t realize that my boot was a cast and thought I was wearing mismatched footwear as a fashion statement. “That is wild!” he said. I love that guy.
I also love my friends at CBD, who give me coffee and sometimes draw on my cup:

this is a boot, not a heart

So, now I guess I’ll just have to hope my boot survives these next weeks. It’s looking pretty beat up. If I bought a pair of shoes and they fell apart this fast, I would return them. At least this thing is magically healing my footbones while making the rest of me lopsided and unfashionable.